A somewhat terrifying scribble of meOk, so I know I have posted a GAZILLION times today... and I am very sorry. This shall be the last one for today, I so totally promise.
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1) My arms have expanded. I am not imagining it. I have LITERALLY eaten 3 pounds of FAT STORAGE OVER 2 DAYS... So I can expect to be 115 again. WHAT A DUMB ARSE. This basically takes me back to Goal 1...
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2) Sweats that my arms are NEVER going to heal. This is SO SO dumb. I have another one. yep. YEP. All I did was scratch my shoulder. I am going to be COVERED in little while circle scars for my entire life (I have one from aged 13, so it is a possibility) It is actually ridiculous. It isn't like I haven't tried stuff. We have had plasters, antiseptic wipes, witch gel, iodine, her disinfectant, my disinfectant, this cicaderma stuff and now silver cream healing stuff. NOTHING WORKS. 8 septic scratches, not all minor, on 2 arms. I look hidious. As soon as I get on UK soil - DOCTORS - Free ANTIBIOTICS. THIS HAS TO STOP DAMN IT.
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3) I am NEVER going to be ready for Durham. 8 weeks. 2 MONTHS to get ready. AND I have barely done a damn thing. HOW CRAP CAN I BE? You know what I really want to do: WORK. I cant work when I am this wound up. 9 days of JUICE fast and WORK - But I know I will end up sleeping. ARGGHHHHHH.HHHH.HH.H.H.H.H.HH.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H
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4) Oh, what's the point. it is always the same, always the same. Always the same, same, same, same, same, same, same, same. SAME. I dont want SAME anymore. I NEED DIFFERENT. I need to have 9 days of losing weight - 9 days of doing ANY work, ANY is better than NONE - 15-9 is 106lbs. I COULD get to 106 if I lose 1lb a day. IF I STICK TO THIS I CAN LOSE WEIGHT AMANDA. 106LBS. ALMOST GOAL 4. THINK ABOUT GOAL 4 THAT WAS PARIS' GOAL.
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1) My arms have expanded. I am not imagining it. I have LITERALLY eaten 3 pounds of FAT STORAGE OVER 2 DAYS... So I can expect to be 115 again. WHAT A DUMB ARSE. This basically takes me back to Goal 1...
.
2) Sweats that my arms are NEVER going to heal. This is SO SO dumb. I have another one. yep. YEP. All I did was scratch my shoulder. I am going to be COVERED in little while circle scars for my entire life (I have one from aged 13, so it is a possibility) It is actually ridiculous. It isn't like I haven't tried stuff. We have had plasters, antiseptic wipes, witch gel, iodine, her disinfectant, my disinfectant, this cicaderma stuff and now silver cream healing stuff. NOTHING WORKS. 8 septic scratches, not all minor, on 2 arms. I look hidious. As soon as I get on UK soil - DOCTORS - Free ANTIBIOTICS. THIS HAS TO STOP DAMN IT.
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3) I am NEVER going to be ready for Durham. 8 weeks. 2 MONTHS to get ready. AND I have barely done a damn thing. HOW CRAP CAN I BE? You know what I really want to do: WORK. I cant work when I am this wound up. 9 days of JUICE fast and WORK - But I know I will end up sleeping. ARGGHHHHHH.HHHH.HH.H.H.H.H.HH.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H.H
.
4) Oh, what's the point. it is always the same, always the same. Always the same, same, same, same, same, same, same, same. SAME. I dont want SAME anymore. I NEED DIFFERENT. I need to have 9 days of losing weight - 9 days of doing ANY work, ANY is better than NONE - 15-9 is 106lbs. I COULD get to 106 if I lose 1lb a day. IF I STICK TO THIS I CAN LOSE WEIGHT AMANDA. 106LBS. ALMOST GOAL 4. THINK ABOUT GOAL 4 THAT WAS PARIS' GOAL.
We can do this! I won't be joining you on the juice fast sadly, since I live with my parents and they like to make sure I eat dinner. But dinner is all I shall eat.
ReplyDeleteIt's kind of ironic that my goal for these 10 days is where you are at the moment - oh curse my newly fat ways.
I know how you feel about the arms, I had a shower earlier and felt like my arms looked like those of a middle aged obese woman.
Let's go! haha xxx
Likewise to you with the disappointment... but! Let us be optimistic my friend, for there will be no blips. We are both going to do amazingly well alreet? I really should weigh myself to get a start weight.. but I don't want to. Lol.
ReplyDeleteWhy is the first day of a new restriction always so tiring?! xxx